Fireflies Till They’re Gone, 2012

my wife’s the only one who knows

i have sinned against my god and the one who’s loved me only for so long
and i know that there are weaker men than me who’ve found the courage to be strong
she understands how shame could drive me crazy and for that i love her so
i’ve betrayed her love a thousand times and still my wife’s the only one who knows

it was never my intention to become the faithless man you see today
but i could not make the longing for those other arms just stop and go away
she understands i stay because i need her and for that i love her so
and for sad and lonely reasons of her own my wife’s the only one who knows

she knows i’ll spend tomorrow in the arms of someone she will never know
who leads me through the darkness in my soul where she and i could never go

i had hoped i’d find a way somehow to end this shameful double life i lead
but now i’ve come to realize that ending it would kill a part of me
she understands it has to be this way and for that i love her so
i still can’t believe that after all this time my wife’s the only one who knows

eight second lives

you’re slow to rise
and i know it ain’t ’cause you’ve been lovin’ me
ain’t no surprise
you’re not as young as you pretend to be
but i’ve seen it all before
what’s a dusty cowboy to an aging whore?

the coffee’s on
you start another can of straight cut skoal
you’ll soon be gone
six hundred miles another rodeo
ten hours behind the wheel
they’ll pull that gate for you in laramie

eight second lives eight seconds later
one more bull rider who ain’t ever gonna die
eight second lives eight seconds later
don’t get no wiser and it ain’t clear we even try
eight second lives eight seconds later

down in the chutes
you drawed up bad but you’ll ride anyway
good enough for you
this ol’ bullridin’s still the only way
ain’t got a thing to prove
sad old bull’s about as tired as you

(chorus)

you’re slow to rise
and i know it ain’t ’cause you’ve been lovin’ me

i just can’t fall out of love with you

well the morning comes and finds me here alone
i guess that i’m a fool for hangin’ on
but hangin’ on is all i know to do
’cause i just can’t fall out of love with you

my friends remind me how you left me here
alone to drown in misery and in tears
and somewhere deep inside i know it’s true
but i just can’t fall out of love with you

i’m gettin’ tired of throwing good love after bad
but it seems you’re only happy when i’m sad
so if it brings you joy then i’ll just stay blue
’cause i just can’t fall out of love with you
no i just can’t fall out of love with you

on a sunday in march, 55082

well the river broke up yesterday
snow is melting in the yard
and the twins are down in florida
and the days are not so hard
but i made my sconnie run this morning
for some wine to get me through
and it’s snowin’ down in dallas
and i’m still missin’ you

well the tulips think it’s over now
but i know better than they do
this house has seen a hundred winters
a hundred springs and summers too
it stands upon this hill so regal
the lumber barons’ stately view
and it’s snowin’ down in dallas
and i’m still missin’ you

and tomorrow there’ll be snow again
one more time for old times’ sake
another old man dead from shovelin’
another car down in the lake
it’s the longest month of winter
it’s the saddest month for truth
and it’s snowin’ down in dallas
and i’m still missin’ you

CREDITS

Produced by Greg Schutte
Recorded at Bathtub Shrine Recording Co.
NE Minneapolis MN
November 2011-January 2012
Mixed by Greg Schutte

Steel and piano tracks recorded by Steve Fulton at Audiolab, Boise, ID
Bass on My Wife’s the Only One Who Knows recorded by Kevin Smith in Austin, TX
On a Sunday in March, 55082 recorded by Cleve Hattersley at the Hermitage, Austin, TX

Mastered by Nick Landis at Terra Nova Digital Audio, Austin TX

All songs written by Mary Cutrufello, Cecil’s Pride Music BMI
except "It’s Not Supposed to Be That Way"
by Willie Nelson, EMI Longitude Music CO, OBO Full Nelson Music
and "Dreaming My Dreams with You"
by Allen Reynolds, Universal / Songs of Polygram International Inc.

Photography and album artwork by Michael Bauer

Mary Cutrufello uses GHS Strings

MARY thanks Greg, Adam Odor, Michael Bauer, Duey Herron, everyone who played and sang, and everyone who’s kept the faith.

GREG thanks Ellis Drum Company, Bernadette Pollard, Ricardo Ehramijian, and Matt Hupton.

My Wife’s the Only One Who Knows
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, acoustic guitar, percussion
Kevin Smith: upright bass
Jake Hoffman: pedal steel

It’s Not Supposed to Be That Way
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, acoustic guitar
Randy Engelmayer: bass
Jake Hoffman: pedal steel
Steve Fulton: piano
Greg Schutte: drums

Eight Second Lives
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, acoustic guitar, electric guitar, bass
Nick Hensley: harmony vocals
Greg Schutte: drums

I Just Can’t Fall Out of Love with You
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, acoustic guitar, electric guitar, bass
Jake Hoffman: pedal steel
Greg Schutte: drums

On a Sunday in March, 55082
with Greezy Wheels
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, classical guitar
Sweet Mary Hattersley: violin
John Jordan: bass
Greg Schutte: percussion

Dreaming My Dreams with You
featuring the cellos of Jelloslave
Mary Cutrufello: vocals, acoustic guitar, bass
Jacqueline Ultan: cello, left channel
Michelle Kinney: cello, right channel